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True Power

" True power does not need arrogance, a long beard and a barking voice. True power is attained with silk ribbons, charm and intelligence"

- Oriana Fallaci in "Il Divo"


The Price of Admission

Forgive them, UG   

For they know not what they do ................ 

If we truly care about those we want to remain in our inner circle .......and have the desire to recover from our past.....We must share our feelings(gently), so we(they) can reach the ultimate goal of letting it all go. 

        Most traditional/eastern spiritual teachings are simply a collection of words. 

            These words(poems if you will) are filled with signs that point us back to the source. ... Google 'Tao Te Ching' and 'Lao Tzu'

       And the source(our 'being'), in my opinion, is attained by recognizing our past. Embracing it. ...... because 'IT" is the Price of Admission.

      When we acknowledge the source of our pain........ Discuss it openly w/out letting the EGO enter the room...... Totally void of emotion................we GROW. 

           As an Native American chief once said about the caucasion settlers - "The 'white eye' all have tense faces, staring eyes and a cruel demeanor. Always looking as if they always 'need' something".

    That being said, we NEED to disconnect ....... Let Go.

     In order to achieve enlightenment, we must recognize the(my) L.A.W. of Active Recovery.......

            Some people Watch life happen (LOOK)......
            Some people Make life happen (ALLOW) 
            and the rest say "What happened?(WHAT?!)

    Happy Trails - UG

Talking to you Robyn


Meds vs Mania

Oh how we love our mania.......

        As we wake from our 3 hours of sleep, we pop out of bed with excitement. Can't wait to get to work. We quickly wash off our face and run out the door. As we're starting up the car we think......"Did I brush my teeth?........fuck it". We smack the dice and cruise.


             Whether it be on a football field,  in a  recording studio, the custom car shop or Wal-Mart,  we work tirelessly, endlessly . We check the time. The days fly by. We're busy brainstorming. Working out. Writing lyrics. Performing. Fine tuning our engines. We're fucking special, man. "God Damn, I(we) feel good!" Our passion is alive. Ideas are plentiful. Energy is running at a surplus. Many of us experience life for the first time.........What time is it, again?

            Danger Will Robinson

            Bipolar Disorder is like old luggage, herpes and your old varsity jacket. You can't get rid of it. No cure. None. End of story. It's a terminal disease (that is treatable) and must be taken very seriously(over 30% decide to take their own life)............we have to surround ourselves w/ good support and respect bipolar disorder.

             But of course, not before we kick the tires of this "illness". That's what we do.

             I was watching PBS the other night and Charlie Rose was interviewing Dr James Watson. A Nobel laureate who discovered DNA and the testing models that go with it. A huge advocate of cancer research, he noted that mental illness is next in line. He said the number one thing that mental illness needs is more research. Dr Watson said more research is needed to find the specific genome, the rogue gene that causes Bipolar Disorder(or any other mental illness for that matter). Hence my motivation to raise awareness. We need to do something. However the job might be a little bigger than we think. As Chief Martin Brody said in Jaws -  "I think we're gonna need a bigger boat". Hold on to your seats.

           We can't watch more tha 5 minutes of television before we see some kind of advertisement pushing the next wonder drug for bipolar disorder and/or depression. Who isn't depressed these daze? The Economy, the housing market, Iraq. Afganistan, global warming, Pat Tillman,  Swine Flu, Fox News...........what the fuck is going on?! There's an answer. Big Pharm has been using a "shotgun effect"(pun intended) to find the best Band-Aid for our illness(es)........And we wonder, why?

                  "The Tipping Point is the biography of an idea, and the idea is very simple. It is that the best way to understand the emergence of fashion trends, the ebb and flow of crime waves, or, for that matter, the transformation of unknown books into bestsellers, or the rise of teenage smoking, or the phenomena of word of mouth, or any number of the other mysterious changes that mark everyday life is to think of them as epidemics. Ideas and products and messages and behaviors spread just like viruses do."

                            - From Malcolm Gladwell's NY Times bestseller "The Tipping Point"

Remember I said I was dignosed in 1997

                 " It had the makings of an epidemic. From 1994-2003 the number of children diagnosed with bipolar disorder --- a condition characterized by cycles of devastating hopelessness and despair followed by times of ecstatic excitement--- had skyrocketed. In 1994 only twenty-five(25) of every one hundred thousand(100,000) American kids under the age of nineteen were diagnosed as bipolar. But by 2003 the number of cases had shot up by a staggering forty times. A doubling of this rare but serious condition would have been newsworthy in it's own right, but a fortyfold increase made it clear something was going on. The question was what."

                             - From Ori and Rom Brafman's NY Times bestseller "SWAY"

       Let's really think about this for a minute. The more people that are "mentally ill", the more drugs need to be prescribed........and the more drugs that are's a vicious cycle. When it comes to money and control, it's ironic how some things simply happen to get a little extra "push" in order to tip.

            All of us know that when we're first diagnosed, the drugs we're prescribed  are a stone in our shoe. Melancholy days turn into weeks. The fog. We check our guns, sharpen our knives and pick out our favorite Oak tree on the way to/from work. Our loved ones are terrified. They tell us "You're just not yourself" ..." We care about you"..... "The meds are only to keep you safe".    Safe? Safe? If this is safe I'd like to see what fucking dangerous is. These peeps have no idea what we're capable of. We can't stop thinking about the gun, the rope, the tree. Then we finally(hopefully) snap out of it because we're fighters. We're  fucking survivors. This has to get better, right? But how the hell am I gonna get anything done?

           I got an idea...........

           We look into the mirror. We just stare. Who is this MF? We look down at the pill containers. Depakote, Prozac, Nuerontin, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Celexa, Lexapro, Paxil, Symbalta, Effexor. Are you fucking kidding me? What is this shit?  I'm not sick......We look back into the mirror. And back down to the pills as we throw them in the toilet. Fuck these meds. I can't function. So my family doesn't want me to 'off myself', huh? ............ fuck these pills!!!!"

              Danger Part Deux

            After a few days, if we're lucky, we  feel "alive" again......flipped the switch......broke the code. "Finally I can think again.......let's rock and roll!

          This is  where I take the time to tell you this is the REAL danger zone. Even though we think meds suck, there IS a time and a place for them. Trust me.  Been there, done that.  All conspiracy theories aside, we all need to take the time to educate ourselves on the ins and outs of bipolar disorder. Yes, it can be a gift. We are  all creative and intelligent people. Strong-willed visionaries that want to do it "our way". We tend to be a little hard-headed(wink wink) and don't want to believe we're "sick". The fact is, our "gift", our illness, is real. We need to monitor it. It's like a sacred garden that needs to be kept. Nourished. If your meds are not working for you, stay in touch with you doctor(s). Demand to feel better!

The rest is up to you.